May 10, 2008
This kid is great...
They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.
May 6, 2008
little. yellow. different.
May 1, 2008
what is the world coming to? i feel like i complain about this everyday! 
April 30, 2008

looooccooommiiiaaa!

..you knew i had to put this on here. 

“ Hi - just wanted to apologize about the ride in from Brooklyn last nite around 11:30 - i had uncontrolable flatulence and just couldnt help myself, it was pretty audible and bad (i’m on a broccoli cleanse) - it wasnt on purpose, so to the pretty girl that was sitting next to me please dont frown upon it. After you got up i saw you looking at me and i smiled - dont know if you were interested or offended - but maybe if you see this we can get together - i should say i tend to be pretty gassy in general so if thats an issue we probably wont click but then again why would i want to be with someone so superficial. Anyway, hope you see this :)
Craigstlist post entitled “Gassy on the L train” or in other words, “I fart a lot. lets boink”
April 28, 2008
the giant anteater may not have a dazzling intellect, but when you’re an anteater you don’t really need it. 
the giant anteater may not have a dazzling intellect, but when you’re an anteater you don’t really need it. 
April 26, 2008
maybe i do.
April 6, 2008
“ I don’t understand. When its a human, its abortion. when its a chicken - its an omelet.
Pedestrian 

Igor - on cheesy bread.

  • Igor: you know they dont make cheesy bread anymore!?
  • Me: what do they eat instead?!
  • Igor: I dont know. Babies!!
March 31, 2008